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Grandmother's Funeral

Doctor's Note

I'm Late

I Don't Have (that report, my homework, etc.)

I Forgot (your birthday, our anniversary, etc.)

I Haven't (cleaned the garage, done the laundry, etc.)

I Didn't Call

Important Notes on Lying

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Grandmother's Funeral

 

The Grandmother's Funeral, truly a classic in the world of excuse-making. Who wants to question someone about the death of a loved one? Of course, if you're looking at this, chances are you know someone who will forego (or has forgone) anything approaching appropriate decorum. Blame it on the compartmentalization of functions like Human Resources in the modern era, but what was once a fairly taboo topic has become subject to a formidable array of documentation. Will the paper chase never end?

Currently in development are a range of top-secret Chaos-Based Monkey Wisdom ™ technologies to help you out of this proof quagmire.

In the meantime, keep in mind that, even with documentation, you'll want to avoid too many of these, unless you can come up with a great story to account for your excessive number of grandmothers. Or, if you live in Utah.

 

Intended, of course, for entertainment purposes only.

 

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